I think I have like less than 5 blog posts for this year, sorry I know that’s like so pathetic but after EOYs I shall blog more again.
And something is really creeping me out day by day, and something I know that I can no longer hide from because not too long later it’s gonna get me too. Time. Does 2003 seem a very long way back to you? I still remember getting scolded by my K1 teacher because I was licking a serving spoon during lunch time. I still remember I liked Wednesdays the most in kindergarten because for lunch they served rice with potatoes, and Thursdays macaroni. I used to hate Fridays because lunch was bee hoon and I hated plain bee hoon over anything else (I still do) and every single day after lunch I would go to the playground and dive into the sandpit and pretend I was digging a trap so my classmates could fall inside, but of course the depth of the entire sandpit was only like 30cm.
I still remember we had noontime naps and this guy called Simon always took the corner beside the books because he had some medical condition and he needed to have things his way (I wonder how is he now) and I also remember this Keefe guy who always intruded into the principal’s office just to get aircon even though teacher already told him like a gazillion times if he did that again she would slap him hard.
And I remember when someone said “I have a sister in P2!” and everyone would think like how great a deal P2 is and would all look up whenever some primary school kid came back and visited the kindergarten.
And then I stepped into primary school for the first time, such an eye opener especially the size of the building awed me, like I couldn’t believe this entire building was mine to freely wander, and when I first sat at my very first primary 1 desk, damn I felt proud having my own desk even though we were sharing classrooms with the a.m session people.
I remember always wanting to be the good kid, always wanting to be the smart kid. Always wanting to be the sportiest, the most enthusiastic, the best at everything. Basically when I was young, I was a hell of a perfectionist. Don’t know where that trait had lost to along the years because sure as hell I am not a perfectionist now, at least not at everything I do because sometimes I just find the lack of motivation to give a damn for even anything like washing the plates where I would literally throw the plates into the sink and just leave it there for God to clean it up for me. I’m sorry mum.
And to be honest when I was in P2 I thought I would never have the need to take PSLE because I mean 4 years is so far away right?? WRONG.
It’s always good to have dreams, to believe you are the best, to believe in your abilities when you are young, before you grow up a little bit more and realize for every single thing you do, someone is doing it better than you. And no matter how hard you try, someone’s still gonna beat you. And then you realize crying isn’t attracting a lot of sympathy after all, and people start calling you names and giving you nasty looks. Because after all, growing up is a catastrophe nobody likes to experience.
If I were in a normal secondary school, I’d probably start feeling worried because of O levels next year, and final year in secondary school. If I were in any other school apart from RV and Dunman, next year would be the last year I spent in the same school compound again. But just so happens I don’t need to change school compounds at all for sec and JC. And I still feel incredibly lucky for that, because I’m a person who cannot adapt to change very well. And nostalgia hits me like a train.
B division 2014, are you ready? Am I ready for my last year in B division? Am I ready to seize my last season as a secondary school student? No I am not, and as much as I’m hoping for it to come because I love competition periods, I hate it to come because all good things pass by in the blink of an eye.
I’ve met so much people in my entire life, people come and go, do appreciate those who stay. If they say they love you, appreciate it because not everybody will tell you that. Appreciate your close friends who stood by you when the stormiest seasons hit you, and thank your enemies for teaching you how to be a stronger person.
Life’s a battle, are you ready?