Life is all about taking risks, I realized that a long time ago. There’s always two sides to a story, and ultimately it is your decision which side of the story to believe.
Choices have consequences, and the outcome of the consequence weighing against the decision to perform the task leading to the consequence – which is more worth it? Is it worth risking something you hold dear for an intense moment of greed?
Rejection. How many times were you initially told yes, then later brutally rejected because of various reasons – you’re not good enough, you’re not old enough, you’re not experienced enough.
Hope. Something that’s so powerful, yet so difficult to perform under times of hardship.
Right now, I don’t even know what I want, and I don’t know what to choose, because I honestly don’t know what’s in store for me. I don’t know how to react to failures, and I don’t know how to react to successes either. I don’t know which side of life to look at, unsure of the rapid, fast-moving world. I don’t know how to react to consequences, good or bad, and I always let the matter pass too easily. What is it that sometimes, maybe just the slightest bit of hope can light me up, whereas at other times even a huge blessing can pass and I still stubbornly wouldn’t realize it.
I don’t know which side of the story to look at, and to every risk taken, I don’t know if it’ll be worth it even after it’s done. I don’t know what life has in store for us, and I don’t know how to react to that. I hate the mystery life has for us, unfolding little by little every minute but when it’s finally revealed, you’re already near dead, if not already dead. Seize the day, they said. But it really isn’t that easy when life’s paths are all filled with little rocks and pebbles, and occasionally a huge boulder you can’t move on your own.
Why am I doing this? What is my duty to live on Earth for? Am I destined to do something great? What can I contribute to humankind, even in the slightest bit?
I don’t know.
I hate this huge mystery life has thrown to us, born without a reason – your destiny to find out the purpose of your living.
I just don’t know.
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